Disclaimer: I'm not pointing a finger at anyone. I'm sorry if this post might not be nice to read or may have wrong information or wrong presumptions.
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Do you think love is a feeling? It is always said that it is. I don't think that's all. If you romantically love a person because they are the person who fits you the best, understands you the most, has been there for you the most, sacrificed for you the most, clicks with you best (probably can go on forever)...that's good. That's definitely good. But I think there's a loophole if that's all love is to you.
What if, along comes someone, who can accomplish all those criteria better than your current romantic interest? What if, your current romantic interest, starts to quit doing those things? I know this one is a bit far-fetched, but what if, that person you've been in love with, is someone who has pretended to be the ideal love interest of your life because they want to get something from you?
Will you stop loving them?
"If two people are truly in love, none of those things would happen," you might say. Okay. That's true. But how do you know if the person you love, really loves you back?
"I just do."
Okay, I've no objections to that answer. But just in case, my questions have sent some doubts running through your mind...may I offer my opinion?
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away."
1 Corinthians 13 : 4-8
Quoting the most famous (I think) paragraph on love, isn't enough to explain my point.Nevertheless, take another look at those words. To sum up this passage, it says that love is the greatest and most important virtue a human being should have; it can apply to different types of love, but let's think about it in the context of romance. Never once did it mention about love feeling good. Instead, it speaks of love as an act of faith, trust, selflessness... That last sentence gives a small hint that love is deaf, dumb and blind, if I interpret it in my own way.
Is the love that we have just a temporary satisfaction to our physical, emotional, mental and spiritual needs? Or is it something, more solid than that? How do we make sure it doesn't crumble under the hardest of trials? You might say that you love someone, but you can never tell how you will react when face-to-face with the biggest obstacles.
So therefore, I believe that love is a decision. Sure, those feelings are the things that first attract you to a person and lead you to this decision. But once you make that decision, it must be a decision that cannot be affected anymore by feelings, because the feelings become accessories. If you are unable to make such a decision, you may not be ready or it may be the wrong person (or he/she may not be ready yet, depends; also remember that, he/she being the wrong person for you would just mean that you are the wrong person for them as well...just saying).
There are a couple of ways I think that can help someone decide. I strongly believe that praying is the top of the list. Next, as probably most people would say, is getting to know the person as a friend. Not sure about the rest...I'm no expert.
Is someone slow, or too long a wait? Maybe they are just taking their time, to make that decision~~
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WHY AM I SO SERIOUS? I just took all the fun out of love, didn't I? Well, this is after all, my opinion. I just wanted to encourage healthy relationships. (Because, it indirectly affects the next generation, and I want to do everything I can to prevent the next generation from living in broken homes. Hence, keep in mind that 1, your spouse should be someone who encourages you to be a better child of God and 2, attraction between man and woman aren't just meant to increase the human population, but to produce children who become righteous men and women.)
Dear mom and dad, I think you are good examples, so thank you. God bless you (I love you, but I prefer to keep these three words for special occasions so that they actually mean something).
Oh, by the way, let me know if I missed something. Thanks.
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